What I learnt from the birth of my first child

Pregnancy is surreal, at least for me it was. It's an ever changing experience and although you might have the theory of it, the reality is far different.

Pregnancy however is the easy part, what comes after is what we should spend time talking about. Many first time mothers myself spent our entire pregnancy reading about what to ‘expect when you're expecting’, which baby seat is best etc but very little time researching the fourth trimester- which has recently been introduced into obstetrics practice.

The fourth trimester is the 12 week period after the birth of your baby and is filled with a multitude of physical and emotional changes for both you and baby. Your baby will adapt to life outside of the womb and you to a new life as a mum. It’s an extremely challenging time in life(but you will survive it 100% of us did) as you learn to juggle your emotions, the pain of your recent delivery, the struggle of breastfeeding, the care of your new born baby and not forgetting the sleepless nights.

The Hard Truth

What I learnt very early is that there is no miracle cure for it, there isn’t a postnatal vitamin that can make it all smooth sailing but being mentally prepared for it definitely makes it better.

Knowing that this is a natural response, that baby blues are normal and expected made it easier to deal with, that crying on day 9-11 is common, that resenting your husband for being able to go back to work is understandable or for wanting just 10 minutes of quiet me time is reasonable - and this is all part of the fourth trimester.

The Good News

But it’s also a time where you learn to let go, where deadlines, routines and being in control no longer matters and simple things like a smile fills your heart with peace.

I learnt that some days will be easier than others, and that it’s okay to slow down and acknowledge your weakness, but also allow your body to heal.

I learnt to find balance in life, as opposed to continuously needing to be busy or ‘needed’.

Most importantly I learnt that I was stronger than I thought I was 2 weeks into motherhood and that I’m the best mother to my daughter as I’m the only mother she knows.